“Kissing, Hand Holding, Bed Sharing, etc!” – the May 2017 Carnival of Aces – Call for Submissions

The “Carnival of Aces” is a blogging carnival where each month people are invited to write on a specific topic that is related to asexuality/the ace spectrum in some way. Aromanticism is often grouped in as a thing to talk about as well, or even just “instead”, if desired. 😉

(Also, vloggers are invited to speak on the topic in videos, artists/poets invited to be inspired by the topic, etc — whatever format you wish to participate with, please, use that format.)

Check out the masterpost of all of the other amazing topics previous carnivals have been on: https://asexualagenda.wordpress.com/a-carnival-of-aces-masterpost/

April 2017’s was on “Aromanticism, Asexuality and Parenthood” and received 5 submissions (see all the way at the bottom of that post for some of them) – it was hosted by Ettina over at Abnormaldiversity.

For this current month, May, this is the fourth time that I am hosting the carnival. I hosted in 2014 and 2015, and it’s been a while but I’m excited to host yet again. I decided to make the topic Kissing, Hand Holding, Bed Sharing, etc!.

The topic is meant to be broad. You are not limited to one of those 3 things just mentioned.

A bunch of ideas on what people might write about:

  • A narrative of your personal experience(s) with something like kissing, hand-holding, sharing a bed for any reason, or other things that came to mind when I listed those things
  • A delineation of where specific actions fit, categorically, in your mind/experience/gut feeling. Is marriage inherently romantic? Is hugging something that fits in different categories depending on other factors? Does making-out kissing feel sexual to you?
  • A personal outline of specific positive desires and/or what you wish to avoid in your future that you feel are affected by your romantic and/or sexual orientation
  • Does your perception of certain activities influence your label/add to your reasons for identifying as grey-aro or grey-ace, or why you chose just “asexual” and not grey kind of a thing? How? Or contrarily, does the way you feel about something like “going on dates” or even “having sex”, an action or experience, influence how or why you identify?
  • Is there something that you love/appreciate, or hate/are frustrated by, in terms of how a specific action or set of actions are discussed in ace spaces?
  • What do you think of how these types of behaviors are used in works of fiction? “There Is Only One Bed” is a common trope on TV shows, for instance, or as Sara K. mentioned & linked to in her review here, a couple of us were discussing in a comment thread in March how sometimes writers seem to “consider the dividing line between ‘romantic’ and ‘aromantic’ to be enjoying kissing and hand-holding.” – How do you, the blogger in this Carnival, feel about that?
  • How does touch-aversion, sex-repulsion, or other aspects of your experience intersect with any of these types of scenarios?
  • Talk to me about consent in contexts it’s usually not talked about in!
  • Tell me how you define that nebulous word “cuddling”. When you say you do or don’t like cuddling, what action(s) are you referring to?
  • Are there certain actions that onlookers insist “Seem” or “must be” sexual, or romantic, but to you feel entirely non-sexual or non-romantic?
  • Anything else that this topic inspires in you! I want to know what you have to say!

Let me know in the comments if you have any questions or concerns.

To submit your entry, either leave a comment below or send an email to me at pemk7@aol.com . The deadline is the end of the day Wednesday, May 31st!  If you would like to post anonymously, I can copy and paste text from an email into a Guest post on this blog of mine, just let me know that this is your wish. You can also contact me via my tumblr, which is luvtheheaven.tumblr.com – links don’t send in “Asks” though. I do receive submissions and messages but in my opinion, email is easier, and comments here are easiest.


25 thoughts on ““Kissing, Hand Holding, Bed Sharing, etc!” – the May 2017 Carnival of Aces – Call for Submissions

    1. Thank you for writing this entry!! I’m so glad this carnival topic of mine wasn’t a failure in the end lol. I’m going to write at least one post for it too.

      I want to also get back into blogging more in general. “Luckily” because my qpp broke up with me it turns out I’m a lot more free this weekend (we were gonna go camping) so I should have time before the weekend is over. 😉


    1. If you want me to add your (second) post to my round-up late, after whenever you’ve written it, I can do that. Also I could delay posting the round-up by up to maybe 24 hours, just let me know.


    2. Also I’m sorry to hear that and I hope your dad – and anyone else who was in the car or on the road – wasn’t injured. I totaled my car a little over a week ago as well so I’m acutely aware of how that can complicate plans.


      1. Yeah, only the deer was hurt, fortunately. Unfortunately, my grandfather just died, so that complicates things even further.
        I’m loath to ask you to delay, because if I still can’t get it done in time, I’d feel bad about having you delay it for nothing. But if you could edit it in if/when I get the later parts finished, that would be great.

        Liked by 1 person

        1. Don’t worry – my grandfather and I weren’t close. I think I was a baby when I last saw him. But my Mom is torn up. It’s complicated because he was abusive and she’d stopped having contact many years ago, but part of her always hoped they’d reconcile, which obviously can’t happen now. So she’s pretty sad.

          Liked by 1 person

          1. I’m very sorry to hear that. My sincere sympathies for your mother’s loss and complicated grief. I’m glad she has you during this time. I think i recently went through a grieving process with some similarities to that after finally seeing/speaking to my abusive mom who I’m no contact with again for the first time in 7 years (combined with me grieving my grandmother’s death. I posted about this on my blog).


          2. Part 2 of my submission is now up:
            I will probably not have any more parts coming soon, due to the STC (a government-run intercity transit company in Saskatchewan) closing, which greatly complicates my access to the university and therefore to SPSS. (Everything’s happening at once for me right now, isn’t it?) So don’t bother delaying for my sake.

            Liked by 1 person

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